Wednesday, March 26, 2008
I was looking through the desktop for a pic to use, and saw this. It doesn't go with any topic, but I love it. It is from Paige's 2nd birthday. We went to ChuckECheeses and oldest dd curled her hair. I always wanted a child with curly hair. But my specifics order must have got misplaced :)
We had our second fost/adopt class last night. Only 8 left! They are every Tuesday for 3 hours. I wish they were more often so we could move faster, but oh well. We found out that the little boy we are interested in adopting is one of the kids they uses as a child profile in the class. I let the teacher know, and she is going to let us watch his video before hand, so we know what to expect. As I am a crier! I know all the background, but I think seeing him on film, and talking about him, may be a breakdown point for me, as this is a child I already carry in my heart.
So how was everyones Easter? Ours was wonderful and busy! Just the way I like it :)
Friday, March 21, 2008
I have been working my booty off redecorating the house. Our house is 3 levels. The bottom level we have a "day" basement which means it is not a dark scary basement. It has full size windows that our ground level, and only about 5 or 6 steps down to it.
Anyhoo it had white walls, and was just a big ugly room full of kids toys a school stuff and just clutter. So I grabbed 2 colors of paint, some garbage bags and got to work. The transformation is amazing. I was unsure of the color we picked for the accent wall, but it has really grown on me. I found curtains on sale that I LOVE! They really tie the whole room together. I will post a pic later after I vacuum.
The pic above is a bunny I found at the dollar store. It looks like a chocolate bunny, and cracks me up so I had to buy it. Dh thinks I am insane. But thats okay, that may be just what gets me through life sometimes. I good dose of insanity can be fun. LOL
And last Tuesday we started MAPP classes. We have to take them every Tuesday for 10 weeks, so we can get our adoption license. So only 9 more to go! LOL They are 3 hours long, and seem okay. I am hoping to learn some good skills from them.
Monday, March 17, 2008
Dh and I just finished watching this. I had seen it before when it originally aired, but was happy to watch it again. Sometimes I really wish was still like that. Where there was an chance to go out to the middle of nowhere and it we could survive for 5 years we would get 150 acres. No real close neighbors, no phone, no television. Just my family, and honest hard work.
Dd talked to her 1/2 sister tonight. Birth mom was able to get her for the night, so I was kind enough ( Dh said I was WAY TOO NICE) to call back and let dd talk to her. Now let me mention, they never had a huge bond. The were not together very often, and when they were dd 1/2 sister was VERY cruel to her. I let her choose if she wanted to talk to her, and she did. She just told her about all the vacations we have took, and all the toys she has. LOL When she hung up she was smiling. I asked her why she was so happy. She said " Because you are my best Mommy forever, and they are far away." Shocking what at 3 1/2 that kid knows. But now she has spoke to both of them, and really seems to have no interest in doing again anytime soon. So I know I need to reel in the contact. My heart aches, as I know this is going to cause some amount of drama with my Grandmother. But I am Mom and my rules are law here. Plus I think I need some distance from my Grandmother. I heard her on the phone with dd asking her to put me on the phone. She didnt refer to me as " Put Mommy on the phone" she said " Put Kelly on the phone" Dd said " Who?" and kept saying "who?" every time she referred to me by name. Finally my Grandma said " Get your Mommy" and dd gave me the phone. LOL So chalk one up to dd. LOL And Dh was upset because BM kept saying " I'll talk to you tomorrow." Ummm no you wont. So I have been as nice as I can be, and it is time to wrap my family in love, and normalcy, and cut the drama out of our lives.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Of being sick and tired! Dh,16 and 8 yo dd are coughing, Both little girls have pink eye, Ds 14 has some weird knot on his leg, and I have a slight cough and stuffy nose. This has gone on long enough! So I have decided that I am putting the house on quarantine this week ( Which shall be fun as it is Spring Break) and everyone is going to get better. No one is leaving unless it is to work, or an Dr appt, and no one is coming in bringing their cooties!
As for the picture. It really has no point other then I love it. Those a reg size beanie babies, not the big ones. I will never get over how tiny she was. Especially since she is all sprawled out over my side of the bed as I type. LOL Amazing and sad how time flies!
So anyone have any exciting plans for St Patrick's day?
Dh will be gone all day and most the night. He works for the local food bank, and volunteered to help out at some canned food drive. So the kids, and I will rest and eat junk. Green junk of course. Well since I am dieting I will just be feeding the kids the junk, and eating salad. Hey at least it is green! HAPPY ST PATRICKS DAY!
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Above pic is dd signing her adoption papers in Nov. (Notice we all match!LOL) Super cute that they had all the kids in the family sign. So today was the big day. Birth Mom was at Grandmas. They let her out a day early. I called there to get it done and over with, so I didn't have to stress about it all day. BM and I talked for about 45 minutes and it went well. I let her know everything that had been going on, and also that I will always answer any questions she has honestly. She didn't ask to talk to dd which is good since I told her months ago she couldn't until I saw she was going to be a healthy part of dd life. So after I got off the phone I went and talked to dd. Now at 3 1/2 she is wise beyond her years. I let her know that BM was living with Grandma now, and I had talked to her. Dd then told me she wants BM to tell her she is sorry. LOL So I asked her if she wanted to talk to her, and she said "yes so she can tell me she is sorry."
She also asked if she could just call her by her 1st name, and I told her that was fine. So I called BM back and told her we would call before bed to give dd the rest of the day to make sure she was okay to talk to her. So 8pm rolls around, and dd is fine with it. She kept asking me if it was time to call so she could tell her she was sorry. LOL
She got on the phone said hello and then said " Are you going to tell me your sorry now?" I had to walk away so she didn't see me laugh. DD has some speech delays so sometimes she is hard to understand. So BM was asking her some questions, and I left the room but close enough I could make sure all was well. I heard dd say bye, then yelled "Mommy heres the phone" So I got back on and BM was laughing, she said she could understand her a little, but could really understand the last thing she said which was "Are you going to say your sorry to me?" LOL So BM told she was sorry and dd said "ok bye" then gave me the phone. She was all smiles and giggles getting ready for bed, and seems as though a weight has been lifted off of her. I think she needed that closure, and to know that talking to BM doesn't mean she will leave us. So I am so happy that it went well for all involved. I really would love for them to have a healthy relationship, dd needs that as does BM, so hopefully we will stay on a healthy path. I told BM I would call on Easter but it was up to dd if she wanted to talk, and she said that was fine and thanked me. So now I can sleep peacefully, and most importantly so can dd.
See the above picture? She looks all cute and sweet. That is our 2 1/2 yo Paige. Whom for some reason I call Peggy LOL. But anyhoo, do not let the picture fool you! She is our child that we know that if she would have been the 1st born she would have been the last born. She runs thing around here. We are just here to serve her. I have not slept more then a few hours since we brought her tiny self home from the hospital those 2 years ago. She was 2 1/2 lbs at birth, and came home at 4 lb. She slept with us so I could keep a close eye and ear on her. Well SHE IS STILL SLEEPING WITH US! Now I am all for co sleeping. I have done it with all the kids, But this one sleeps not only like she did when we brought her home ( You know waking up every 2 hours to eat) But when she is asleep she snores like a bear. It is amazing the sounds that can come from the precious little blessing. So here I sit 3am listening to her and hubby in stereo, watching "cheaters" and typing blurry eyed on here. I hope all of you are getting some rest!
Monday, March 10, 2008
My wonderful, very old, sweet Grandmother who wants to see the best in everyone no matter what called me on Sunday. She never calls me,but I do call her every week. She called to tell me 2 things. Neither of which I wanted to hear. The 1st being my drunken, abusive stepfather called her a ton on Sat leaving mean drunk messages on her machine. Somewhere in his ramblings he mentioned that he was calling to talk about me. Please,give me a break. He wants me to let him claim some of our kids on his taxes. How pickeled does ones brain have to be to think that is going to happen. beside being illegal, I can name a million and one reasons I wouldnt do it. Now on to the 2nd. DD birth Mom gets out this coming up Sunday, and she went to visit her last Sat. So I got to hear how wonderful she looks, and the poor thing just wants to get her life back. Blah Blah Blah. Now I am all for giving 2nd chances. Sadly this is FAR from a 2nd chance. Mind you she also continued on how BM's poor boyfriend went to prison for being in a stolen car, that he had NO idea. Ya, mmmhmm. Funny how BM knows all this stuff and writes to boyfriends family,but didnt even send a Christmas letter to dd. I am curious to see if she is still planning on hiring that lawyer to sue us to get dd back. Oh how I want to take my husband and precious children and move to the middle of nowhere, and be left alone by everyone elses drama and issues.
But since that is not going to happen, Dh and I have decided to just cut ourselves off from a lot of baggage. I love my Grandmother, but I cannot trust her to not give out information to BM, so I will cut back on what I tell her, and how often I call. Since BM will be living with her once she gets out of prison I dont see myself calling much anyways.
Thursday, March 6, 2008
My darling little sister let me know I havent blogged in 3 days. It has been so crazy here that I didnt even realize! Things have been busy as normal, with some added stuff thrown in. I have been re doing the basement to set up an place for school. Not that I dont enjoy have to move everything off the kitchen table all day long to eat, but it is past time to have a dedicated place. And it needed painted down there. Okay now when I say basement I dont mean like those dark scary basements you see on tv with those tiny windows. There is only 5 steps down into ours and it has full size windows. They are just ground level. I just dont know what the heck else to call it except the basement. LOL So anyhoo I have been painting, and even got chalkboard paint and made our very own, very cool chalkboard on the wall. Dh and the kids thought it wouldnt work. Hmmph...they have no faith in me. And were they shocked to see it does. VERY COOL! I will post pics once I get the border done. I really dont like painting but love the outcome, so I will just trudge along.
And speaking of my darling little sister,I found out I am going to be an aunt. FINALLY! I am super excited, but it is bittersweet since I am in another state. I spent a good hour crying about it the other night, which drives Dh crazy as he wants to fix everything. And since his job is here, and the housing market sucks so we cant sell our house and make a profit right now, I will have to remain in another state. And she is due in nov so I am totally hoping on a Halloween baby! LOL I wanted to have our last one on Halloween since it was suppose to be a scheduled c section, but Dh said it was creepy. LOL Our oldest was born on Christmas so I thought it would be cool.
Oh a totally different note on Super Nanny last night she had 7 kids. One was ADHD. Although my heart went out to the Mom as she needed help,I couldnt help but think maybe if I invited her over here for a few days she would feel better. LOL 3 teenagers, 3 on the autism spectrum (and one of those with hypertonia), and one with PTSD, food issues and ADHD. And I wouldnt trade any of it :)
Sunday, March 2, 2008
My tooth is still killing me. I am beyond tired of it. I cannot wait til the dentist office opens tomorrow morning. Hopefully they can get me in tomorrow.
On another note dd's birth Mom is still in jail, and I noticed a new charge when I looked online. "ASSAULT W/DEADLY WEAPON ON PEACE OFFICER,FIREMAN OR ANOTHER" Thats new and exciting. (Insert eye rolling smiley here) I really wonder when she is going to learn. She has been locked up this time since Sept. Told my grandmother that she wasnt talking to her dealer boyfriend, and wanted to get her life together when she got out. Well dealer boyfriend went to jail, and has now been sent to prision for 18 mo with 2 Grand Theft Auto charges. And has mailed over a dozen letters to my grandmothers house. So we now know that all her promises, and plans were yet again LIES. And she wants to talk to MY dd on the phone and visit her. Sure why dont I just sent her up for you to fail her again. Smoking meth your whole pregnancy wasnt enough, driving around with her in the car high on meth wasnt enough, living in a crack house with 20 other people in 2 bedrooms wasnt enough? Where is rock bottom for some people? "I" would think when the state takes away your girls yet AGAIN, 1 goes to her birth Dad, and the other is adopted by a very distant cousin would be it, but I guess not. My children are my entire life. The thought of doing anything to harm them, yet alone lose them is a thought my brain cannot even process. Luckily for my dd she now is safe, loved, and well cared for. But with PTSD, and what we think may be early signs of severe ADHD, and food issues she has been through enough in 3 years. I will not subject her to any more damage from the woman who gave her life.