Summer Fun :)

The past 2 weeks have found us at cub scout day camp (for me and 10 yo ds) and a "cake camp" for 11 yo dd. Everyone else could be found in the play pools I picked up the other day.

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Poof! And A Fresh Start

"It isn't as bad as you think it is. It all works out. Don't worry-I say that to myself every morning. it will all work out. If you do your best, it will all work out. Put your trist in God, and move forward with faith and confidence in the future. " 
— Gordon B. Hinckley



Some of you read a post that was here Sat. Out of respect for my husband I took it down. There was a lot of turmoil in my home Saturday afternoon. A lot of frustration and tears, and thankfully a lot of talking.

I am from the "I really don't care what people think of me" camp. My husband is the opposite. He worries that people are judging us, or talking about us behind our back. I informed him that I am sure they are, and who cares. Only one person gets to judge me that I care about, and it sure isn't someone sitting inside our Church building on Sunday. The people with the hurtful comments, and judging nature will all have to answer for themselves one day before Heavenly Father. So I will continue to go to Church for all the right reasons. Hopefully my husband will join me.

So now it is Monday, the start of a new week. My husbands work has a bunch of mandatory overtime til the end of the month, so we will not be seeing much of him until July. The extra pay is always nice, but I am sad since Sat is his birthday and he will be at work.

It is too hot here now to go do anything, so I will take this time to clean out cabinets, and drawers, and organize, organize and organize.

I want to work these next few weeks on getting the clutter out of my life. Be it actual clutter, mental clutter, or just "junk" from other people that is cluttering. It is time to de junk! I do not want anything in my home or my life that is not useful, or makes me and my family happy.

I hope everyone is having a wonderful Summer so far and finding lots of joy in your life's journey!





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Okay here is a nicer post :)

Wow I was crabby at 5 am! Its been a very long week here. We have had the flu going around and it seems to be hitting each kid one at a time, so we are dragging it out for what seems like forever :(

Also this week my youngest ds had a new appt with his psychologist. We have had a VERY rough month with him.  They tried to switch his meds which made him so out of control he couldn't attend the last 5 days of special needs pre school. The teacher requesting (in a very round about way) that he should just stay home "since they really were not going to be doing anything anyways." How could I send my child to a school with a teacher that I know doesn't want him there :( So he started summer break a week early. We switched him back to his old meds, that work about 5 hours, but after the new meds I will happily take the 5 hours.

So back to this weeks appt. I kept being told by other professionals in his life that he "seems to have a attachment disorder." And well I can only ignore things for so long before I have to face it. We have had him just shy of 3 years and it was time to face reality. So I brought all kinds of reports from others to his Dr, and we talked and talked while she watched him out of the corner of her eye. " He is very calculating isnt he?" I had to ask her if she was making a statement or asking me an question LOL. Yes he is VERY. You can see from all the reports I brought that everyone else mentions that too, but using words like "sneaky".

So we went over what she sees that he "has"
1.)SEVERE ADHD
2.)PICA (This has actually got better)
3.)Severe head trauma AKA Shaken baby
4.) Extreme neglect and abuse issues ( true, but you think there would be a better term for it)
5.) PDD NOS
and drumroll please....... we have added
6.) Reactive attachment disorder
officially to his paperwork.

Its not like I didnt know. I dont live in that much denial. I guess I just kept praying it was something else, or one of the other dx were causing the same signs.

So we know will be adding a new therapist to our list and I will be reading, reading, reading and reading some more to find the best way to help MY darling almost 5 year old son. ( Capitalizing MY out of anger for bio Mom. It makes me feel better for some reason. For those that don't know the whole story, I am related to bio mom)

My last angry post came from reading a message board when they are lumping every adoptive parent into one group and RAD kids into one. I shouldn't let strangers on the internet get to me, but like I said it has been a long week and I am human.









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With all due respect.....

(This is going to be a very short post, I have been up almost 48 hours with flu ridden kids. I am a tad crabby LOL)

To people that have.....
1.) Never adopted
2.) Do not have a child with autism
3.) Do not have a child with R.A.D. or an " attachment disorder"
4.) Do not have a bi polar child
5.) Are not parenting a child that suffers from PTSD

PLEASE KEEP YOU PARENTING ADVICE ABOUT MY CHILDREN TO YOURSELF!!!! I really dont want to hear "what you would do" unless you have been in the "trenches" and DONE IT, and had some type of result. YOU HAVE NO IDEA what my children have been through, nor what I am going through, so again BE QUIET.

You can say "I'm sorry", "Wow that sucks" or even " Gee I am glad I dont have to deal with that" or "Better you then me I guess"  That would be less irritating quiet honestly.

Okay rant over, and I hopefully I will get some sleep, my children will be flu free and I will have a nicer post tomorrow :)






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Can we love one another, as the Savior has commanded, if we judge each other?

For some time now it seems like a lot of the "Christians" I know have become some of the most very judgmental people I know. This makes my heart hurt in such a deep way. It seems as though people want to fit everyone into some kind of mold. My heart is also angry right now so I am trying to be very careful in my words. My 17 year old son has had his ears pierced since he was about 2. ( I didn't do it, and didn't know about it til after the fact) Also I was not a Christian when he was 2, and lead the complete opposite of my life I lead now. He hasn't worn earrings since he was like 3. He has been asking if he could put some in. We have said no, up until the point where he graduated High School, and is working a full time job. I feel like he is old and mature enough to make that choice for himself. The deal was he couldn't wear them to Church  or Church activities. Well last night he forgot to take them out. Someone felt the need to talk to him about it, and in so many words told him he was a bad role model (Not sure when he ever claimed to be a role model) and then questioned him in his faith and plans to serve a mission. Now we all know earrings come out right? Its not a tattoo on his forehead. He doesn't drink, smoke, do drugs, go to parties, heck he doesn't even date. He is an amazing kid that helps with his special needs brothers and sisters, works full time, is always home by curfew of before, and loves the Lord. Sometimes we need to pick our battles. If his having sparkly earring in his ears that can be taken out is my biggest concern for him, then well I think we are pretty lucky.
Our own Church prophet has given many talks on not judging others. We talk about listening to the words of our prophet, maybe we should make sure we are listening to all his words and not picking and choosing what works for us.

"At a recent conference for Mormon women, Thomas S. Monson encouraged women to be kinder to each other and to avoid criticism. Following is a quote from that sermon and several thoughts from previous talks on the subject of not judging others.

Each Person is Unique

My dear sisters, each of you is unique. You are different from each other in many ways. There are those of you who are married. Some of you stay at home with your children, while others of you work outside your homes. Some of you are empty-nesters. There are those of you who are married but do not have children. There are those who are divorced, those who are widowed. Many of you are single women. Some of you have college degrees; some of you do not. There are those who can afford the latest fashions and those who are lucky to have one appropriate Sunday outfit. Such differences are almost endless. Do these differences tempt us to judge one another?

Mother Teresa, a Catholic nun who worked among the poor in India most of her life, spoke this profound truth: “If you judge people, you have no time to love them.” The Savior has admonished, “This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you.” I ask: Can we love one another, as the Savior has commanded, if we judge each other? And I answer—with Mother Teresa—“No; we cannot” (General Relief Society Meeting, September 25, 2010).

AND

Courage to Refrain From Judging

May I speak first about the courage to refrain from judging others. Oh, you may ask, “Does this really take courage?” And I would reply that I believe there are many times when refraining from judgment—or gossip or criticism, which are certainly akin to judgment—takes an act of courage.

Unfortunately, there are those who feel it necessary to criticize and to belittle others. You have, no doubt, been with such people, as you will be in the future. My dear young friends, we are not left to wonder what our behavior should be in such situations. In the Sermon on the Mount, the Savior declared, “Judge not.” At a later time He admonished, “Cease to find fault one with another.” It will take real courage when you are surrounded by your peers and feeling the pressure to participate in such criticisms and judgments to refrain from joining in.

I would venture to say that there are young women around you who, because of your unkind comments and criticism, are often left out. It seems to be the pattern, particularly at this time in your lives, to avoid or to be unkind to those who might be judged different, those who don’t fit the mold of what we or others think they should be.

The Savior said:

“A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another. …

“By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.”

Thomas S. Monson, “May You Have Courage,” Liahona, May 2009, 123–27

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Patience With Young People

 A proper perspective of our young men is absolutely essential for those called to serve them. They are young, pliable, eager, and filled with unlimited energy. Sometimes they make mistakes. I remember a meeting where we of the First Presidency and the Twelve were reviewing a youthful mistake made by a missionary. The tone was serious and rather critical, when Elder LeGrand Richards said, “Now, brethren, if the good Lord wanted to put a forty-year-old head on a nineteen-year-old body, He would have done so. But He didn’t. He placed a nineteen-year-old head on a nineteen-year-old body, and we should be a bit more understanding.” The mood of the group changed, the problem was solved, and we moved on with the meeting.

Thomas S. Monson, “‘Called to Serve’,” Ensign, Nov 1991, 46

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Graduation :)

On May 27th (yes I am a slacker) My oldest son graduated. Well actually he was done with all his classes last year, but he wasn't finished early enough to walk. Arizona Families For Home Education AKA AFHE, puts on an amazing homeschool graduation. There were 150 kids, and about 2500 spectators. The ceremony was beautiful, and included a great slide show of baby and senior pics.  So now he moves onto the "real world" sniff sniff.  So to the child that changed my mind about only ever wanted girls LOL, I am so proud of you and love you so very much.

                                                                    His 2 big sisters :)

                                                                  The 6 younger kids

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